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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29292762">simple complications</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/incxndias/pseuds/incxndias'>incxndias</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Agent Dani Clayton, Agent Jamie Taylor, Angst, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Friends to Enemies to Lovers, buckle up gays it'll get sad, dani being nervous and gay, jamie being sad and gay, not really enemies just want nothing to do with each other, really they're both just gay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:20:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,378</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29292762</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/incxndias/pseuds/incxndias</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jamie Taylor. The best in her division. Never once beaten out in all the years she had been with the agency. The news of a particular person rejoining them shouldn’t have fazed her, it shouldn’t have seemingly set her heart ablaze or made her stomach turn over as if she were riding a roller coaster. No, she shouldn’t have been affected by the information. </p><p>But blonde hair and blue eyes found their way into her thoughts easily, even after nearly six years.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dani Clayton/Jamie, Hannah Grose/Owen Sharma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. miscommunication</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi everyone, this just kind of happened while I was between classes. Probably should've been completing my missing work, but this happened instead. It's a little short, but I hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jamie Taylor. The best in her division. Never once beaten out in all the years she had been with the agency. The news of a particular person rejoining them shouldn’t have fazed her, it shouldn’t have seemingly set her heart ablaze or made her stomach turn over as if she were riding a roller coaster. No, she shouldn’t have been affected by the information. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It had been years since she’d last seen her. Nearly six years, in fact, since that forsaken trip to Bali. The only time she had questioned her morals, her training, the regard she had for her own life, had been in Bali. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The whole mission started out swimmingly, they arrived at the safehouse on time and got everything prepared. The who, the what, the where. The last bit had been a little harder to figure out, but they eventually tracked the location to a worn-down warehouse. Her bright smile, filled with an optimism Jamie had only experienced when she was around, lit up the room as she cheered when the monitor beeped with coordinates. Jamie, in all her effort, couldn’t keep from smiling as well, couldn’t peel her green eyes away from the ocean of blue they had grown fond of. Later on, as they geared up to make their way toward the warehouse, a kiss. Barely there, but light and affirming, gone as quickly as it appeared. The smallest smiles graced their lips just before they parted ways and hopped into separate vans. Jamie had ignored the ache in her chest, the ache that grew the closer they got to the warehouse. In all her time with the agency, fighting the bad guys, she had never felt anything like the growing ache’s insistency when she stepped out of the van. It told her to turn around, to take the blue eyes she loved and run as far as they could in the opposite direction. She wondered if the blue eyed woman she had become so taken with over the few months they had known each other felt the same ache. The same need. But, she had kept on and went to survey the warehouse. It was simple, really. The warehouse turned up empty, and she gave the okay. Whatever happened next was on her, for not taking a better look. Blue eyes found their way to her as they continued to search for anything that could jump out at them, anything that was unsuspecting. They found nothing. Searched the place up and down, and found nothing. Seconds later, a panic-filled voice filled their comms. A look, one look at each other was all it took for the other to know that it would end badly. In the end, it should have been Jamie. Blue eyes were already screaming at her to go as she reached for the source of their panic. The longer they stood arguing - Jamie knew she wouldn’t have relented easily - the less time either of them had to make their escape. So, Jamie went. She huffed in frustration and turned on her heel to run out. All she heard once she got outside was the clattering of metal. All she heard when she was yards away from the warehouse was a boom. An all-consuming, deafening boom. All that filled her was worry and dread for the owner of the blue eyes as she felt her body lurch forward onto the gravel beneath her, before she allowed a threatening sleep to overtake her. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She woke up what could have only been fifteen minutes later, still in the same spot. It took her a moment to recount everything, but once she remembered, once she thought about, the panic began to rise. She moved on autopilot as she rose to her feet. Her right wrist, the wrist she used to push herself up with, ached. She’d worry about it and the throbbing in her head later. Right now she needed to find that ocean of blue. She needed to know she was okay. Jamie stumbled over to the rubble of the once large building, and hoped she didn’t find blonde hair peeking out between any cement pieces. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her heart, beating too fastly before, lurched to a stop as she saw freshly painted hot-pink fingernails poking out from beneath a rusted piece of metal and smaller piece of cement. They weren’t moving. They just sat there. Taunting her until she moved to uncover the person attached to them. She couldn’t speak, she couldn’t yell, so she just moved. She uncovered. She kept moving pieces and pieces of rubble until she found a nasty gash just along her neck and her leg. She waited, patiently, for something to happen. For Hannah, for Owen. For her to wake up. To tell Jamie that she was okay, that she would be okay despite the gashes and the bumps and bruises. But that didn’t happen, not when Hannah found them minutes later and called a team to extract the blonde and bring her back to headquarters. Not when she had woken up in the headquarters’ infirmary, Jamie sat by her side, tearful and numb at the same time, having to be the one to break the news to her. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Jamie.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Panic. </span>
  </em>
  <em></em>
  <span></span><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Jamie. I can’t… I can’t feel my legs,” heavy, quick breaths overtook the original silence. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jamie calmed her down, no stranger to panic attacks. Especially the blonde’s. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Once her breathing calmed and her blue eyes met Jamie’s own, seemingly holding some shred of hope in what Jamie had to say. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Well, it broke Jamie’s heart all the more. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You… you’re temporarily paralyzed.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And that was it. That was it until the blonde was put on leave from the agency - an open invitation if she ever wanted to come back, if she were ever well enough to come back - and moved to Vermont to teach a classroom of kids while she was undergoing physical therapy. They both, in their last few days with each other, folded in on themselves. The air was heavy, and the blonde’s patience, which Jamie always admired her for, seemed to vanish when she couldn’t do the simplest things. They didn’t talk. They just sat and only spoke if it were necessary. Jamie tried to keep her up to date on the mission, on the progress and who got assigned in their place. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Days later, though, tears streaming down both of their faces after an argument that had been too common in the last week, the blonde left. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The time had flown by since then, it seemed. Jamie kept herself busy with missions and plants. She hadn’t gotten close to anyone other than Hannah and Owen. She didn’t allow her thoughts to drift back to the girl that now only occupied her thoughts at night, when Jamie gave herself time to think about the life the blonde was building. The life that could’ve been if she had stayed with the agency in California, or if Jamie had gone with her to Vermont. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jamie,” a gruff voice pulled her out of her mind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” She looked up and found Owen standing above her. The stiff chair she chose to sit in was the only thing keeping her afloat, and she knew he could tell. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you okay?” He pulled up his own chair and sat next to her, the topic of conversation being a heavy one neither of them wanted the rest of the agents crammed into the debrief area to hear. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean?” She played it off, shrugged off the feelings in the pit of her stomach, the rapid beating of her heart as if it were trapped in a cage it couldn’t escape. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Owen knew her better than that. He had a way with people, especially her. Always acting like a big brother. Sometimes she hated him for it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s been five years,” he said pointedly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Almost six,” Jamie offered meekly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to be here when she arrives, you know. Hannah will understand.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He offered a way out and Jamie actually considered it for a moment. What kind of leader would that make her, though? Walking out when they had a veteran about to make an appearance. A veteran that wanted to come back and help them with whatever it was she could. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie had no idea how the blonde would be able to help. She had no idea how the physical therapy or the many surgeries she knew the agency had paid for had gone. She had idea if the blonde had changed her appearance, if she were even blonde anymore. If she were the same optimistic and bubbly person Jamie had met for the first time in passing eight years ago, when they were both just starting out at 19. If she could still lay Jamie flat on her back in three seconds. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The only person that was able to beat Jamie was the owner of the blue eye she’d grown infatuated with. The person that was returning after nearly six long years. The person that was practically a stranger to her now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No. I think it’d be better if I was here. Maybe welcome her again, if I can bring myself to. We’re overdue for a chat, don’t you think?” Jamie flashed him a wavering smile, and Owen only looked at her with sympathy as he patted her back and stood up to go over and talk to Hannah.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It seemed like hours of Jamie being stuck in her own thoughts. Hours of contemplating whether or not she should make a run for it while she still could. But, by the looks of the clock on the wall, it had only been fifteen minutes since Owen had left her there with her mind reeling. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Fifteen minutes, and the blonde was said to arrive soon. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried to occupy her mind with thoughts of her next mission. Thoughts of which horrible person they could be after next. The arms dealer they hadn’t been able to catch a year ago, maybe the specialized weapons bidder from a month ago. Her thoughts, her mind betrayed her, as they kept drifting back to soft pastel purple sweaters, blue eyes, and pink lips. Lips that she, five years ago, had found herself wanting to kiss over and over again after every mission. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had only gotten to kiss - actually kiss - once. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The night before they had left for Bali, and neither of them could hold it in anymore after months of longing stares and back and forth comments that bordered the line between friendly and flirtatious. Blue eyes captivated her as they had so many times before. They both leaned in at the same time, and Jamie will never forget the way they both smiled into the kiss and moved with rather than against each other. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The amount of contentment she felt in that- </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The voices of the agents died down and Hannah cleared her throat as everyone that sat, including Jamie, stood. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you could all rise, please. We’re welcoming back someone very special to this agency. Someone that experienced much more than she should have at her young age,” Hannah’s eyes connected with Jamie at that, “and someone so selfless, with more grit and determination than I have ever seen,” Hannah’s eyes found their way back to the empty doorway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie’s jaw clenched as she held her head high, looking in the same direction once again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Everyone, please join us in welcoming back Special Agent Danielle Clayton.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. doing your best (to avoid me)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey y'all! This is another short chapter, I'm sorry! Hopefully I'll have some time this weekend to actually sit down and write something longer. Just didn't want to keep you waiting for too long. I have an idea for next chapter that I think y'all are going to love.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The same blonde hair that fell exactly into place and ocean blue eyes that Jamie was all too familiar with, even after all these years, walked through the empty doorway with the biggest shy smile that lit up the room. There were some gasps, younger agents that heard stories about the special agent before them, and a few from the older agents that helped with training when they were both starting out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not everyone knew of Danielle’s arrival beforehand, but Hannah told Owen, who in turn warned Jamie. She was grateful Owen took the liberty, because she knew that she wouldn’t have reacted well if she didn’t have the time to prepare herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not with the way blue eyes moved around the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The way they sought her out and only rested once they met her own, the emerald green they were most familiar with. Everything slowed as Jamie realized she could only see blue. The excited gasps and clapping of the agents around her faded away and her lips parted without much thought. Her eyes drifted away from Danielle’s, finally taking in the rest of her face. She hadn’t aged at all, but she looked wiser. There was a certain poise present that hadn’t made an appearance before, like she knew how to carry herself better. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Danielle Clayton grew in the years they hadn’t seen each other. It was apparent in the way her back was tall and straight where it used to hunch over when she felt any form of pressure or anxiety gnawing at her, the way she smiled even if it was still a bit shy, especially when looking at Jamie, but it was most noticeable in the way she kept her calm before she went up to the podium near Hannah at the front of the room for her small introduction. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The only person in the room that could tell she was even the slightest bit nervous was Jamie, and even she had to look between the lines. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi, everybody,” she gave a wave and her smile stayed big and warm, “I’m Danielle Clayton, but you can just call me Dani or Agent Clayton, I answer to both,” she let out a small laugh. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t her real laugh, not even close to it, but Jamie found it mesmerizing anyway. The sound of Dani’s voice seemed to be a magnet, and while they would both argue that they were the same south-seeking pole, constantly pushing each other away while trying to save what they had, others around them would have said differently. Would have just called either of them stubborn. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie, whether she wanted to or not, found herself staring. Vision unbothered and focused only on Dani as she made her speech. She tried to catch the blue eyes that wandered around the room but they were quick with their avoidance, hopping from agent to agent, Hannah to Owen, skipping over her and seeking out the wall that stood behind her instead. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright, well, guess I’ve talked long enough.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hadn’t even heard the speech. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for welcoming me back. It’s good to be here,” Dani grinned and nodded in Hannah and Owen’s direction. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie, for probably the first time since she’d ranked high enough to become an agent, was glad she wasn’t standing right at her friends’ side like usual. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dani walked down from the podium and greeted a few people before they returned to their work. Currently, the blonde had nowhere to be. Jamie didn’t either, but the training room that was filled with weights and punching bags seemed like a very good place to run off to. And as she saw Dani heading toward Owen and Hannah, asking someone to spar with her seemed like an even better idea. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She quickly took four steps toward them, gaining Hannah’s attention and earning a raised eyebrow while Owen’s eyes and smile were still aimed at Dani. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m going to go to the training room. Figure I could always work on something.” She nervously bit at her lip. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hannah only gave her a pointed look, “Jamie, it’s been a week since you–”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Which is why I need to go all the more,” she interrupted, her eyes darting towards Dani getting nearer. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hannah, observant as ever, saw the slight falter and apprehension in Dani’s step. Noticed the way Jamie practically bounced on the balls of her feet as she awaited Hannah’s okay to escape the awkwardness and avoidance that was bound to happen if she stayed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Actually, save the training room for tomorrow. It’ll give the new recruits an ego boost if you’re off your game,” Hannah gave her the smallest of smiles. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A plan. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hannah had a plan. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie could see the cogs turning in her head, but as Dani kept walking toward them, albeit slowly, all the brunette could worry about was getting away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go to the armory. We’ve just got some new tasers and the like, you’re more than welcome to test them out. Just stay away from the explosives, will you? We can’t handle another repeat of Peru.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Peru was a great time, don’t know what you’re talking about, love,” Owen, glancing away from Dani for a moment, chimed in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not a fun time when the agency was made to clean up the mess of the couple of idiots I told them I trusted most with the job,” Hannah turned to him and raised her eyebrows before turning back to Jamie. “Go test them out for me, will you? You are honestly one of the only people I trust with that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes ma’am,” Jamie nodded jokingly and turned to make her way out of the meeting area. She hadn’t gotten to test out new weapons in a while, and the excitement had already started to build. Dani lingered in the back of her mind as she started to walk out, but imagining the new gadgets she’d get to play with - responsibly, of course - erased most her fear. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Until she felt fingers brush past her own with arms so close they could link together. Shoulders collided. Blonde hair whipped in the opposite direction as blue eyes met hers. The blue eyes she could get lost in forever, just there. Right in front of her. Waiting for her to do something, it seemed. Pulling her in until she found herself leaning forward only slightly. She blinked away her trance and forced herself to look away from pools of blue. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dani looked like she wanted to say something, anything. Her mouth opened and closed but she couldn’t force the words out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nothing but a muttered, “I’m sorry.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The words held more weight than either of them expected. Years and years of no communication and “I’m sorry” held more meaning than a half-assed apology. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie couldn’t say anything, only clenched her jaw and stared straight at the woman in front of her. She tried to convey her questions with her eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But in the end they just held anger and betrayal. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One could never stay mad at Dani Clayton for long, though, she knew from experience. So, as she said nothing, as she walked away from that moment, she promised herself she would hold her grudge against Dani Clayton for as long as she could. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’d stick it out until it felt near impossible to do so. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Again, I'm sorry it was so short. The rest of the chapters will be longer, though! School just kind of has me swamped right now. </p><p>Anyway, let me know what you think, comments are always appreciated. </p><p>As always, you can find me on Twitter @/loveqvinns</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. can’t tell you why</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey everybody! This one’s a little longer than the first two, but not quite where I wanted it. Hope you enjoy anyway, though!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Three days. Three grueling days of sticking it out. Sticking to the routine she had made for herself years ago. She woke up at six in the morning, on the dot, got up and dressed, made herself a brew, watered the plants if they needed a bit of hydration, and then went off to work. There were smaller things she accomplished in between like brushing her teeth or pulling her messy curls into the best ponytail she could manage– with the help of bobby pins and clips, of course. </p>
<p>She focused on her plants when she arrived home each day, looked for unwanted life on the sidewalks she crossed and nursed them back to health. Five more plants had made their way into her apartment in the past three days. However cramped the apartment got, at least it was full of life. Something she could give her all to and receive results for. Not instantaneously, but the promise of results eventually is what drew her in. Jamie knew that for all the work she put in, something beautiful would come from it. </p>
<p>No use in putting all the effort toward people at work. People she didn’t know very well other than Hannah and Owen. No use in forcing the people to put in the effort for her either. </p>
<p>The plants, though they served as a good outlet for anything, best worked as a distraction. Something to do to keep idle hands from having a mind of their own.</p>
<p>The distraction had worked well enough in the past. When her parents would fight in her younger years, she turned to the small potted plant her grandmother had given her the one time she visited before she passed. She talked to it to drown out the noise. It hadn’t helped much, but it also kept Mikey distracted when he would sneak past the entrance to the hallway and into her room, shutting the door quietly behind him before crawling into her lap and hugging her tightly. They’d talk to the plant, fed it with words rather than water on most occasions. </p>
<p>Simpler times, she thought as she busied herself around the building, watering the few plants Hannah kept around for her sake. But even the hydrangeas she’d been nursing back to life couldn’t keep the flashes of blonde from returning to the corner of her eye. </p>
<p>Every corner in the goddamned building. </p>
<p>Every hallway. </p>
<p>Every room. </p>
<p>Dani Clayton would somehow worm her way into it, wherever it may be. The distractions of plants weren’t enough when Jamie could so clearly hear Dani’s laugh echo throughout the short distance between them as she made conversation with other agents. Newer agents Jamie honestly hadn’t found the time to speak to yet, only acknowledge in passing with a curt nod. </p>
<p>Jamie focused on pouring the water into the soil. Watched as the soil dampened and started to allow the water to seep through and down to the roots. Gently, she brought her hand up to a rather down-looking leaf. Her eyebrows furrowed a bit before deciding that the plant wouldn’t miss the small leaf, as it had several bigger ones anyway. She pulled her special scissors from her back pocket– no one was allowed to touch her scissors– and gently cut the leaf’s stem. The leaf stayed delicately in her hand and she turned it over to examine before actually trusting her decision to cut it off completely. Jamie was good with split second decisions, she had to be in her line of work, but when it came to plants she always second guessed herself for a moment,  even if she knew she was doing the right thing. </p>
<p>Plants were the one thing she wouldn’t allow herself to fuck up. </p>
<p>Jamie folded her hand with the leaf still in it and put it into her back pocket to keep it safe until she could find a proper trash bin to throw it in. She was too nervous to look up from the soil, the feeling of eyes trained on her from a distance had arrived when she got there and hadn’t left since. They lingered, would never stare for too long before turning their attention to something else. She’d encountered the feeling on more than one occasion, during missions and stakeouts, when she was a teenager and would walk freely down the sidewalk with her then girlfriend’s hand in her own. While the gaze felt different than the rest, she could tell there was a certain want within it. Death normally made an appearance in the hungry stares during missions or through the scopes of snipers on high buildings during stakeouts. </p>
<p>The stare that bore into her left side was just pure want, though. Something left unsaid that unsettled her. </p>
<p>Women’s black dress shoes, like her own, made their way into the corner of her left eye. They stopped a few feet away from her, probably allowing her the time to look up. She didn’t, though. She kept her eyes trained on the soil and busied herself with looking at the rest of the leaves despite having thoroughly checked them already. </p>
<p>Jamie knew who she would see if she looked beyond the dress shoes. Beyond the navy blue slacks and matching blazer. Trailing her gaze upward would only lead to blonde hair and blue eyes. </p>
<p>Dani’s presence had become one she was accustomed to. Even in the years they had barely acknowledged each other, and the years they had sparsely exchanged words during smaller assignments. She knew Danielle Clayton’s presence like the back of her hand. Almost better than she knew plants. </p>
<p>Almost. </p>
<p>“Agent Taylor?” The voice cracked at the start, barely noticeable by anyone that hadn’t known the woman it belonged to. The rest of the question was spoken confidently, surely. As if using that tone of voice would answer the millions of unanswered questions that swirled in the space between them. </p>
<p>Jamie took a deep breath and sighed, examined the leaf her gentle fingers had been holding up for a moment longer. Then, she turned her head and looked up into eyes that reminded her of the sky. Eyes that once reassured her and allowed her to think up limitless possibilities. </p>
<p>The sky, in her case, had an actual limit. No galaxies were found after the accident. No stars, no comets. Just a barrier. </p>
<p>The sky, in her case, ended up being a wall with cracks just small enough so that she couldn’t fit through. </p>
<p>Couldn’t reach the stars or comets beyond, so she just crashed back down to the earth. Tumbled down with the rest of her world. </p>
<p>Looking into sky blue eyes again felt like crashing into the earth all over. </p>
<p>“What can I do for you, Agent Clayton?” </p>
<p>Strictly professional. </p>
<p>And if Dani noticed the small waver in her voice, she hadn’t shown it. </p>
<p>“Would you…” Agent Clayton bit at her bottom for a moment before her eyebrows furrowed and her features softened determinedly, “would you accompany me on a walk? Just around the building. It seems like a lot has changed, and I’d ask Hannah or Owen– Director Grose and–” </p>
<p>Dani cut herself off when she remembered who she was speaking to. Jamie could pinpoint her exact realization. </p>
<p>“They’re both busy right now, and you’re the only other person here that I know, it seems.” She finished with a worried sort of smile. </p>
<p>“Well, Agent Clayton. Seems like you’ve been getting along fine without me so far.” Jamie quipped with the raise of her left eyebrow. </p>
<p>“You know me better than that,” the blonde said softly, her eyes hopeful. </p>
<p>Jamie only looked at her with a hurt, scrutinizing gaze. </p>
<p>“Do I, Agent Clayton?” </p>
<p>Then she walked away. </p>
<p><br/><br/>⎼⎼⎼⎼⎼⎼⎼</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jamie, I just want to talk to you. Just let me explain.” </p>
<p>In hindsight, Jamie should have known Dani wouldn’t stop until she let her pour her heart out and explain herself through a nervously stringed together apology. If that’s what she was getting, of course. She had learned to stop expecting things from people the moment her mother left, and then again when Dani took off to Vermont to teach kids how to properly utilize a comma or the correct forms of “your” and “their” and in what contexts use them. </p>
<p>The one thing she should have expected from Dani Clayton was persistence. </p>
<p>Jamie looked down at her scuffed combat boots while she held a mug of tea in the other hand. The break room– more like a lounge area, if she were being honest– was tense with silence, Jamie having been the only one in there before Dani snuck in behind her. The brunette lifted the mug to her lips and slowly took a sip, allowing herself a small smirk when she saw Dani’s eyes widen slightly. She brought it back down after being satisfied enough and placed it on the countertop by the microwave. </p>
<p>“It’s been three hours since you’ve last seen me, Dani. And in those three hours, I’ve sparred with five new trainees just trying to get them up to speed for when Hannah has her way with them on Friday. I’m a bit too tired for a chat right now, ‘m afraid,” Jamie leaned against the countertop, putting her hands on either side to support herself. </p>
<p>“You used to be able to take on twice that in an hour,” Dani scoffed and crossed her arms. The scoff was for show, the blonde’s smile edging it’s way onto her lips as she tried to tease the woman before her. </p>
<p>“Just getting older, I guess. Nothing I can do about it.” </p>
<p>“Oh, come on. That’s bullshit right there,” she rolled her eyes. </p>
<p>Jamie only shrugged her shoulders and reached for her mug again. She took another sip before setting it back down and looking back at Dani. </p>
<p>The blonde’s features had softened, her lips pulled into a straight line that smoothly curved down toward the ends. Her eyebrows were knit together while her eyes found their way to Jamie’s face. They seemed to scan everywhere, just barely grazing over her eyes for the shortest of seconds. </p>
<p>Jamie understood. </p>
<p>Dani was analyzing her. Trying to figure out what Jamie wouldn’t voice. </p>
<p>The frustration in sky blue eyes almost made her laugh despite everything. Despite up and running, after all these years, Dani still had the nerve to walk in and act like she still knew exactly how to read Jamie. Maybe she did. Maybe the frustration was because Jamie wouldn’t openly voice her opinions on the heavy weight that lay upon both their shoulders. </p>
<p>“Five minutes,” Dani eventually whispered. “Please.” </p>
<p>Jamie sighed in relief at the defeated expression on Dani’s face. The walls she had spent years building worked on everyone. Including Dani Clayton. </p>
<p>Her heart, however. Her heart felt like it shattered into pieces. </p>
<p>“Five minutes,” she nodded and crossed her arms right below her chest. </p>
<p>Dani looked down at her hands for a moment and allowed her shoulders to slump, knowing she didn’t have to put on a show for Jamie. She could be outright. Lay everything on the table. Jamie would prefer it that way, too. </p>
<p>She took another moment, fiddled with her hands, and bit at her lip before she started to pace back and forth, though she made sure to stay in front of Jamie. </p>
<p>“Firstly,” her eyes stayed trained on the rough carpet beneath them, “I want to thank you. For all of it. Everything. You did so much to make sure that I was okay after the accident. You were always right there. Every time I needed you, you didn’t hesitate. You didn’t look at me like I was broken or– with pity like everyone else did.” </p>
<p>The blonde bit her lip in concentration before she stopped pacing a few feet in front of Jamie. Blue eyes snapped up to meet hers once more, “So, thank you. For being there when I needed you.” </p>
<p>There were so many things she could say. So many things she wanted to say. But instead she lifted her mug of tea to her lips and sipped at it. Dani was nowhere near finished, eyes shining with a cluster of regret and sadness and disappointment, all directed toward herself. </p>
<p>Jamie just couldn't bring herself to use her words, either. She couldn’t let herself fall into the world’s trap for a second time. Some sick joke to make up for all of the people she’s harmed, maybe, even if they weren’t the most morally correct bunch. </p>
<p>“And–” Dani started pacing again but with her eyes trained on the ceiling instead of the multi-colored bits of carpet. </p>
<p>She took a deep breath and searched for the correct words. </p>
<p>Blonde hair whipped around, lips turned down just enough that it wasn’t quite a pout, and eyebrows furrowed. </p>
<p>Control of something– Jamie couldn’t figure out what– was given to Dani in that moment. </p>
<p>Dani took the time to really stare her down. She searched Jamie’s face and swam through emerald seas while also somehow laying herself bare, holding out all hope that the brunette would take one more leap and glide through blue skies. The journey through the skies wouldn’t be met with the obstacles of walls with the tiniest cracks or barriers of clouds that became gray and hardened with lightning and thunder. </p>
<p>Jamie didn’t leap, though.</p>
<p>She carefully walked along on the edge of something old. Memories Dani would prefer to keep tucked away although they both lived through them. She understood she had to make a choice. She could choose the gray; lightning appearing every second, thunder rumbling its displeasure at Jamie teetering on the edge of bluer skies with fluffy clouds and birds and rainbows. Or she could choose the bluer skies; a new leaf turned over, a willingness to try, to apologize and then forget, the hope to be forgiven. </p>
<p>Quick decisions were always sure decisions. They were never second guessed or dwelled on. Jamie stayed confident in all of the quick decisions she’d made. </p>
<p>She left herself there, standing clumsily on the edge. She didn’t choose, only tore her gaze away from Dani’s and set her mug of tea down.</p>
<p>She left Dani stranded, too. </p>
<p>“Jay-” the blonde’s voice was barely above a whisper. Another audible crack somewhere in the nickname forced the tension between them to grow. </p>
<p>Jamie didn’t have the heart to so much as glance in her direction. </p>
<p>“You didn’t write back,” she said after a long beat and drew her bottom lip between her teeth. Her eyes kept their focus on her black dress shoes. </p>
<p>“You didn’t write. You didn’t call or text. Left me layin’ awake at night wonderin’ if you were okay. If you had even made it to Vermont safely. Had to have Hannah tell me that you were managing fine two weeks later.”  </p>
<p>She could feel Dani’s stare boring into her as it had earlier while she was fixing up the plants, only now it seemed curious and still instead of anxious and hungry with want. </p>
<p>“Laid awake every night ‘til one in the morning, hoping that you’d somehow make your way back. Just roll on right through the door and we’d say our apologies for the stupid fights and maybe everything would go back to normal. To how it was before.” </p>
<p>“But it didn’t,” Dani offered, her voice so small and unsure. </p>
<p>“It didn’t. Because you never came back.” </p>
<p>A low blow. </p>
<p>She knew that. But, in her mind it was deserved. </p>
<p>She had let Dani in in the short time they had known each other, in the short time they had actually gotten to know each other. There was a certain pull that Dani possessed. Her smile was easy, her laugh loud and uncaring. Most importantly, she listened to Jamie. Whenever there was something she needed to get off her chest, Dani always listened no matter how sad or how much it angered her.</p>
<p>Kind and generous in every way, Dani Clayton was also fucking beautiful. </p>
<p>And Jamie, well, she’d always had a soft spot for beautiful women, but every day leading up to the accident she found herself softening up even more for the stunning American. </p>
<p>“But I’m here now.” </p>
<p>She sounded so sure when the words escaped her lips. Confident as if she wouldn’t back down or shy away from the cold and closed off demeanor the woman across from her steeled herself with. </p>
<p>As if she didn’t know that she could shatter Jamie’s heart into pieces with just one more meeting of blue eyes. </p>
<p>The brunette wanted to scoff. </p>
<p>Wanted to scream. </p>
<p>
  <em>Where were you when I needed you? </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Where were you when we needed each other? </em>
</p>
<p>Instead, she settled for, “A lot has changed in five– nearly six– years.” </p>
<p>“Time changes things,” Dani shrugged, though her tone was pleading . </p>
<p>“Including people, Poppins.” </p>
<p>Jamie’s eyes widened for a moment. She let the nickname slip. </p>
<p>
  <em>Shit. </em>
</p>
<p>She took a chance and looked up at Dani, only had to see the slight upturn at the corners of her mouth before her heart stopped and sped up all in one rapid movement. </p>
<p>“Even you,” she continued, keeping her eyes on Dani, “even me.” </p>
<p>“So let me get to know the new Jamie.” </p>
<p>Another plea. </p>
<p>“Don’t know if I can do that, Dani.” </p>
<p>
  <em>Don’t think I can handle you leaving again. </em>
</p>
<p>“You’ve done it before.” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Jamie let out a short, bitter, huffed laugh, “and look where it got me.” </p>
<p>“That’s not f-” </p>
<p>“Fair?” Jamie cut her off and finally leaned off the counter where her tea sat. She only walked a step or two closer to Dani. </p>
<p>She was close to seething. </p>
<p>“I seem to remember you being the one that left. Just up and ran.” </p>
<p>“It was a lot to deal with-” Dani’s eyes were cast down. </p>
<p>“I was trying to help you!” </p>
<p>She didn’t mean for the words to come out as they did. Raw, loud, overbearing. Angry, sad, hurt. Every emotion she could think of in that moment seemed to be behind those six words. </p>
<p>Dani’s face sorting itself into that of a kicked puppy didn’t help. </p>
<p>She felt the familiar bite in the back of her throat, the sting of tears gathering at the edges of her eyelids. </p>
<p>Her fists curled at her sides and she pressed her nails into her palms. </p>
<p>“I didn’t mean to yell,” Jamie whispered, her eyes also finding the floor. </p>
<p>“No, you um, you’re right. You were always right there in front of me. Helping with whatever it was I needed.” </p>
<p>She wouldn’t look directly at Dani, but something about her voice made her picture a wistful expression on the blonde’s face. </p>
<p>“I should… I should head back,” she found enough strength to point her thumb in the direction of the closed door. </p>
<p>Dani nodded and Jamie dumped her tea out in the sink that sat in the corner of the counter. </p>
<p>The silence was deafening when she started to walk toward the door. Her hand wrapped around the handle and pushed down. </p>
<p>“Jamie?” </p>
<p>A delicate, warm hand found its place on her forearm. </p>
<p>Their eyes met for what seemed like the millionth time that day. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry.” </p>
<p>Silence. </p>
<p>A never-ending beat. </p>
<p>“I know.” </p>
<p>And Dani’s hand dropped from her arm as she forced herself to look away from blue eyes, pushed the door open, and headed back through the building’s busy hallways. </p>
<p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>... So did you like it? I’ve got big plans for this fic and I’m hoping the ending (though we’re still far from it) will play out well! Don’t worry though, it won’t all be angsty... just most of it. </p>
<p>You’re free to yell at me or let me know what you want to see more of in the fic! </p>
<p>My twitter is @/loveqvinns<br/>My tumblr is @/blyshill</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>How'd you like it? Should I continue with it? Let me know in the comments. </p><p>As always, you can find me on Twitter @/loveqvinns</p></blockquote></div></div>
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